Aren’t You Glad You Don’t Have Anxiety?

Ha! Trick question! Everyone experiences anxiety at one point or another; it’s a part of being alive. As annoying as it may be, anxiety plays an important role in keeping us safe, and motivating us to get things done. For example, I’ve been putting off writing this blog for days, and the only reason I’m writing it now is because of the impending sense of failure and uselessness I feel whenever I think of potentially failing yet another semi-impulsive endeavor (Ok, maybe that’s a bit extreme, but you get my point). Anxiety motivates us to get important tasks done, whether it’s going to work, doing laundry, or just getting out of bed every day. It’s also super important when it comes to keeping us alive. Anxiety is sort of a way for our body to prepare for fight-or-flight without actually triggering a full-on panic response (yet). Common symptoms of anxiety include:

Personally, I experience… all of these. But it’s important to remember that these symptoms are normal and healthy, so long as they occur in appropriate situations and don’t affect your every-day functioning.

We venture into the realm of anxiety disorders when the effects of anxiety begin to interfere with daily life. For example, it’s normal to feel anxious before a test at school. Maybe you cram in some late-night study sessions, talk to friends about the material, and experience some physical symptoms. But you’re able to go to school and take the test with relative success. What’s NOT normal is being physically ill for days before and after the test, not be able to sleep because you can’t stop worrying about not just the test, but everything, and panic so badly you miss school, fail the test because your mind is racing, and/or get sent home due to an anxiety/panic attack. As examples of unhealthy anxiety go, this is a pretty common example. For me, some of the earliest indicators that I had an anxiety disorder were being unable to even begin to attempt timed math tests (Ah, Mad Minutes. The bane of my elementary school existence), and erasing holes in papers that I made a minor mistake on (like, if I didn’t like the way I had written a certain letter, it would be game over for both that piece of paper and the assignment as a whole). My memories of this period of my life are foggy, but I do have vague memories of tightness in my chest, a frequently upset stomach, and a constant irritability that would quickly escalate into hitting myself and/or throwing things.

There are many different mental conditions that fall under the umbrella of “anxiety disorders”. It is possible to have one of these disorders, all of them, or any variation thereof. Some disorders are only diagnosed after what is considered a less-severe condition intensifies, and others can occur at the same time. The 5 major subsets of anxiety disorders are

• Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD) – Chronic anxiety even when there is nothing to provoke an anxiety response (and the source of the outrageously bad pun in the title of this post).

• Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) – Characterized by distressing, repetitive thoughts (obsessions), and/or repetitive behaviors (compulsions). You can read the two posts I’ve written about OCD here and here.

• Panic Disorder – Episodes of unexplained and intense fear, accompanied by physical symptoms such as chest pain, heart palpitations, and/or dizziness.

• Social Anxiety Disorder – Also known as Social Phobia, those with this disorder experience overwhelming anxiety and self-consciousness in normal social situations.

• Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) – Can develop after a traumatic event or series of traumatic events in which grave physical harm occurred or was threatened. A complex disorder that involves flashbacks, detachment, nightmares, avoiding potential triggers, amongst other potentially debilitating symptoms.

Along with an official diagnosis of GAD and OCD, I’ve also experienced symptoms of panic disorder and social anxiety disorder. Many of the symptoms of these disorders overlap and blend together, which is part of why they are all classified as “Anxiety Disorders”. Some of these subcategories have their own, even more specific diagnoses as well.

It’s important to remember that to be diagnosed with any of these disorders, a person has to be experiencing symptoms frequently, and those symptoms have to be interfering with the person’s functioning in every day life. Many of these symptoms on their own are normal and healthy, and not a reason to worry. If you do have any concerns, please go see a medical professional. 

Some people who are diagnosed with one or more of these disorders are only in treatment for them for a short period of time, and others for their whole lives. No matter how long or how severely a person is affected, their feelings and struggles are valid and deserving of compassion. There is no one way of having a disorder that makes it more real than another. Some people develop anxiety issues due to trauma, others are born with a chemical imbalance. No matter how someone comes to have an anxiety disorder, we are all in a similar boat with a similar struggle, and nothing can discount that. We all need love, compassion, and patience as we figure out how to function. 

There have been many times that I’ve needed to be told to suck it up and push through; that I literally could not afford to let my anxiety stop me from doing what needed to get done. But there have been just as many times, if not more, that I needed to hear that it was ok to feel the way I did, and that it was ok to take care of myself first and listen to what my body and mind were telling me. Even if what I was feeling was irrational, it was still valid, and I wasn’t crazy or wrong for feeling it. It is incredibly frustrating to know that what I’m thinking and feeling is irrational, and still not have any control over it. It’s infuriating to feel symptoms of anxiety come on right as I’m trying to get something done, or even better, when nothing is happening at all to trigger an attack. The last thing I need is to be told that I’m being irrational and I have no reason to feel the way I am. I KNOW that, and I’m trying. And I bet I’m not the only one who feels that way. What I, and many others with anxiety disorders need, is patience and support to help us feel less like a burden, and more like a valued part of our friend’s and family’s lives.

In a future post, I will be talking about different coping techniques and which ones I personally used, so keep an eye out for that. For now, be patient, be compassionate, and be strong.

Thanks for reading, I’ll be back soon.